Doctor Who-Carnival Of Monsters (1972)
Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends. The Man, Robert Holmes penned this classic. Yet again, The 3rd Doctor takes a wrong turn trying to get to Metebelis 3. Will he ever make it there in an old, type 40 model TARDIS?! Maybe he should install the Sontaran version of Sat-Nav, erm , maybe not. Instead he & Jo land on the ill-fated S.S. Bernice via 1926 or is it? Nothing is as it appears & his beloved TARDIS may have a cop-out excuse, for once.
Meanwhile, on a seemingly unrelated note, the down on their luck entertainers, Vorg & Shirna arrive 'first class' along with silver cargo, on the planet Inter Minor. For a planet that is an alleged bore it sure is 'trippy'. The Minorians are xenophobic since a space plague almost wiped them out some centuries ago, but their radical thinking President Zarb decides to open up relations with aliens. Their lack of experience is evidenced by Vorg & Shirna 'hitch-hiking' a ride there looking to earn a few credits from the bored functionaries on the verge of revolution from sheer boredom! "Roll up! Roll up! & see The Carnival Of Monsters!". Amongst the cargo & other junk is the miniscope, the piece in an interesting jigsaw puzzle.
The mystery gets more interesting as both The Doc & Jo notice the crew of the S.S. Bernice are trapped in some kind of time-loop complete with a Plesiosaur for company. Why The Doc finds this strange is beyond me since there have been similar sightings in lakes like Loch Ness, Lake Champ, y'know, that one in Sweden & in oceans around the World.
In fact 95% of our oceans is still a smegging mystery, & 2/3rds of this planet is covered in the stuff! So why would The Doc be surprised by that sighting?! You're supposed to be a Timelord for crying out loud!! Time to pop the Valium, methinks. Cryptozoology aside, after some annoying (mainly to Jo) repetitive shenanigans akin to a broken record, they crawl through a shaft of metal alloy unknown to Earth metallurgists into a psychedelic world of giant circuits & flashing lights. Yep, Doctor, we're inside the miniscope!
It doesn't take long for our hero to deduce that the S.S. Bernice & her crew are amongst an interesting collection of other lifeforms also trapped inside for other beings to enjoy watching in their "natural" habitats. Jo finds this appalling. Haven't you ever thrown peanuts for the monkey at the zoo to gobble up, Jo?! Outside, REAL outside, Kalik & his lackey Orum want to take advantage of the yokels chronic boredom to stage an uprising against Pletrac. A little help from the Drashigs exhibit, going riot, outside the miniscope should help.
Ah yes, the Drashigs. Popular with kiddo's y'know, is there something existential going on here? Drashigs are so bad-ass, a battle thruster loaded with tough space marines & the latest armaments wound up being a snack for the omnivorous critters! Okay then, HOW are the crew of the S.S. Bernice able to beat them with tommy-guns & dynamite, not to mention one eradicator on Inter Minor during their rampage?! & HOW convenient Vorg, you had a power pack spare after Kalik went to oh, so much trouble to sabotage it, sarcasm mode off. Other exhibits include Ogrons, servant mercenary race for some obscure race called Daleks, nope? Never heard of 'em either, I'm sure Davros would be proud speaking of which DW regular Micheal Wisher who plays Kalik also played the first Davros. & yes, THAT Cyberman! -See Revenge Of Cybermen blog/review - THAT smegging Cyberman! Shirna's sarcastic retort in that scene pretty much summed it up: "Oh Marvellous!"
Familiar face. Ogron minus Dalek. "OH marvellous!".
Cyber-torture aside we've got one of the most colourful Doctor Who stories in a very colourful era of the show, it's in your face psychedelia whether intended or not! The Pertwee era started both the 70's & colour tele with the gritty, somewhat depressing Season 7 but by Season 8 we get an explosion of fancy colours! Jo is supposed to be "dim-witted", I never noticed, in fact she's an expert in escapology which she demonstrates in this adventure. She would put Houdini, a friend of The Doctors, to shame!
The interior of the miniscope is like being trapped inside your pc, or wristwatch. The Doctor had a hand in getting miniscopes banned by the Timelords as "an offence against the diginity of sentient life!" in fact he practically nagged them to banish miniscopes, WHEN??!! Drashigs hunt by scent & come from a marsh world. Kaliks plan to overthrow President Zarb backfires when one of the 'anarchistic' Drashigs turns to him for a snack. The Inter Minorians are grey skinned, well, they're supposed to be boring aren't they (?) Is it me or are there two minorian species, one subservient to the other like if Homo-Sapiens & Neanderthals shared Earth now, slavery! Lt John Andrews is played by Ian Marter who will become Harry Sullivan in the 4th Doc era. Vorg & Shirna are a class comedy double act in the Robert Holmes tradition, great fun to watch. HI-DE-HI-DE-HA-HA! :)
Class act! Feed me! Booooooooriiiiiiiiing!
Vorg & Shirna practically steal this one. They're on a supposedly dull, planet of borderline fascist, snobs. Their Cockney sounding accents clash in typically classist fashion with the "One must this, one must that, one must, etc, p.o.s.h. POSH!" dialect of their reluctant hosts.
Shirna at one point replies to their prejudice, "We speak like them, by & by." Vorg mistakes The Doctor for a "Carny" from his unique dress sense after being impressed by him giving the Minorians a much needed telling off, no spanking. There's a lot of misinterpreting here, The Doc is confused by Vorgs put-on Carny speech, "Me no speako lame lingo!" Okay not quite put like that. Speaking of prejudice, is Major Daly an old boy product of his 1920's era? Fred Astaire met this ill-fated crew! Despite our hero liberating all the lifeforms from the miniscope, it appears the S.S. Bernice is still set on a Mary Celeste fate on June 4th, 1926, spooky...
Anarchy! Feed me! Another class act! Voyage of the damned!
This is highly praised by my Whovian brethren as a classic, a feeling that is shared by this blog/reviewer. The miniscope has a lifetime guarantee (which is why the company went bust!) unlike my VHS copy of this which suffered the same flood related, mould fate as the rest of my collection!! More Valium *pop*. Chickens scare Jo, maybe some Valium will help? Anywho, enjoy this it's far out! Doctor, we're not in Kansas anymore.
Borgduck aka Stewart, no Valium required.......
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